(Originally appeared in the July/August 2007 issue of Astrology Toronto‘s publication Midheaven and later in the April/May edition 2008 of The Mountain Astrologer magazine)
By Franco
July 2008

The city: Toronto.

The Case: A missing hamster.

My name: Soulbody. Franco Soulbody.

The story you are about to read is true. The names have been kept the same: just for the hell of it. Now, the facts. Just the facts. It all started on a Thursday, a regular Thursday in the big city. Max is the hamster of my girlfriend’s children. The kids are on vacation with their father so Diana, my girlfriend, is looking after the rodent. Before she came over to my place overnight on a Wednesday, she had fed the hamster. When she got home from work Thursday evening … he wasn’t in his cage. (Organ music here!) Obviously, the cage had not been latched properly and the wily little guy managed to escape his home.

She called me: Franco, Astrological Pet Detective. (Theme song here!)

After a quick analysis of the situation, I advised her to leave some food out in various places around the house in order to determine his whereabouts. In the meantime, I had cast the chart for the time when she called to let me know that Max was missing: 18:05 on Thursday, July 10, 2008, Toronto, Ontario.



Since the chart deals with a pet, this is a 6th house question. In horary astrology, the 6th house deals with “animals smaller than a goat” or in general … pets … or small livestock. The 12th house is for animals larger than a goat or generally large livestock or horses. Technically, a Great Dane dog is “smaller than a goat”!!! Nevertheless, Max is nowhere near goat size and therefore I took this as a 6th house matter.

I noticed that the cusp of the 6th House has Taurus on it: an earth sign! Earth signs signify somewhere on or below ground level. The Lord of the 6th house is Venus (ruler of Taurus) and it is in … the 8th house…. in Cancer! (Organ music here!)

This suggests that the furry little guy would be on ground level or below and in a southwest direction (8th House) and probably due south (although Cancer is north, I felt Cancer was south in this chart). Cancer, as a water sign, suggests he would be near water, so bathroom or piping. My girlfriend noted that there no “water” in the SW direction. This puzzled me for a while … what cruel game was this hamster playing?

Another day went by without finding Max but some of the food that was laid out had disappeared. (Organ music here!) It was Saturday, I was finally able to go over to investigate and she had told me that Max may be in the basement. Making my way downstairs, I saw a dehumidifier in the closet which was in the… southwest corner. (Organ music here!) I promptly started clearing out the closet and I later found out that a box which I had moved contained several flotation devices. There was a plaster fresco of women with grapes (Cancer = food). I thought I was onto something.

Once the fresco was moved, I could see Max by the southern wall. He had built himself a little nest with some tissue he had found, and there were food pellets and a couple of pretzels which he had in his possession – the kids must have dropped them while watching TV. I retrieved the hamster and put him in his cage and took his pretzels for evidence. He made a bee line for the water spout and drank for 2 minutes straight. We noted that we should have left out some water for him too!!! Now, that would have been very Cancerian! (Organ music here!)

So, Max was right where the chart said he would be – ground level/basement, on the south wall of the southwest corner of the house near water or, in this case, water type objects. Although, there were no pipes, drains or sinks or other actual water type objects, the dehumidifier which would have had water in it, and the fresco of food (Cancer) were sufficient clues as to his whereabouts.

It’s a big house out there and a big city….but somebody has to look over it. I’m Soulbody. Franco Soulbody and I can say…

CASE CLOSED! (Theme music here!)